I know you are reading this ..

 Now I checked my stats last night and WHOA !! You guys are actually reading this !! So stop in , say hello !! Share your stories with me ! Dont be scared!! =)

Breakdown followed by good day ~

 So last night I pretty much lost it. Tears, snot the whole 9 . I felt so pathetic .I felt like a horrible mother because Im so big . I felt like I was falling apart by the sec!! Not to mention I tripped and almost fell because my feet & legs hurt so badly i couldn't even walk. This all came about after I had worked so hard to get a appt with this doctor and my ride fell through! But thanks to my wonderful, beautiful sister in law , im gonna make it ! I seriously dont know what i would do without her. She always seems to have everything so together and she looks great! Im hoping ill be more like her oneday. Did I mention she has 5 awesome kids and still looks like she's 23 ? She is seriously my hero.
  Sooooo anyway  ... this after noon ... my nutritionist  called to make my appt ! Ive been waiting on this lady forever ! THEN my PCP office manger called and said she had all my referrals i needed for the next  4 appts ! woot ! =)
 I know this probably  makes no sense to anyone reading this but it makes perfect sense to me and thats pretty much all that matters :P

Testing Testing Testing !!

 omg .. all these test are driving me nuts !! I havent even had one of them yet and im already sick of it ! Im having a real problem trying to schedule them all within the time frame the surgeon gave me to have them all done. Some im basically jumping thro hoops here trying to get it all finished up to get this party started ! My PCP office manger hates my guts .. I know it !! haha I bug her every single day needed another referral for something or another . oh well , its her job right ? :P

Gastric bypass on my mind ...

 Okay . So I have a previous post where im talking about I dont know whether to get the lap band or Gastric bypass.  Altho my mind was set on lap band because the idea of it sounds so wonderful .. my mind keeps going back to the bypass. Heres the reasons why after MUCH MUCH thought and for ME and my life and family .. im thinking gastric bypass would be the best option.
 I dont like the idea of having a device inside me .
 I dont want to deal with fills and Pbing , sliming, slippage, being too tight  or any of the other things that come with lap band.
I dont want to lose my weight slowly and I dont want to cut out carbs completely . I like carbs. I FEEL like i should be able to eat healthy and still lose weight . Rather than not eating this or that and really struggling to keep the food down.
 The gastric bypass recovery isnt as long as i thought it was so thats a huge PLUS for me !!
With the bypass ITS DONE !! All i need to do is live and keep my protein up .
I want a lIFE change . I think some people the band because its reversible . I dont want reversible. I want forever.
 SO far this is the best option for ME . The idea of the lap band just keeps getting further and further away from me .
  Ive made some great lap band friends that are doing very well but its just not for me .
So i will start my " new" gastric bypass journal today !! =)